It's the Oscars!

I am tweeting the Oscars for work, so I will updating my blog here from time to time.

Why is Amanda Seyfried at the Oscars? Because she looks like a dress hanger. Can't wait until her 15 minutes are over.

Sandra Bullock looks like an Oscar herself. She says she's always pessimistic - she should have been a little more about "All About Steve."

Ryan Seacrest just told Tyler Perry that Mo'Nique "is here." No way, she showed up? Why would she do that?

As I struggle not to throw up during Red Carpet coverage (I've already switched from E! to the TV Guide Channel), quick quiz - who saw all 10 Best Picture nominees? Yes, I did and yes, I am showing off.

Oh my God! Antonio Banderas has a grey beard!

So far, people who should not be allowed at the Oscars: Melanie Griffith, Sarah Jessica Parker, Miley Cyrus, Rachel McAdams....

Kathryn Bigelow is a FOOT taller than Ryan Seacrest! Hilarious.

More people who don't belong: Jennifer Lopez, her husband Skeletor, Demi Moore (the white haired freak on E! only wants to talk these people)

Nice try at lurking, Clooney.

More people who don't belong: Keanu Reeves (whoa) - on the screen on E! at the same time as Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner. Nice.

More people who don't belong: Keanu Reeves (whoa) - on the screen on E! at the same time as Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner. Nice.

Robert Downey Jr. Siiigghhhhh.............. That is all.

I saw a trailer "Tron Legacy" today and it looks awesome. (Sorry, Jeff Bridges was just on)

Anybody else want to stab Guiliana and the white-haired guy on E! in the eye yet? SO glad it's almost 7!

It was funny to watch the opening montage on ABC and see if any of the couples were still together. I don't think a single one was.

The parade of WTF continues: Cameron Diaz, Jake Gyllenhaal and his dumb video game movie, Zac Efron...

There may be a divide between the movies I am looking forward to and the movies "America" is looking forward to. Hence these presenters.

It's NEIL PATRICK HARRIS! I am cheering! Is anyone else?

Oh, and look, there's that damn Helen Mirren. ... Steve, that's DAME Helen Mirren.

Oh, is it too late? My big prediction is Josh Larsen @larsenonfilm will not like the Oscar hosts and I will love them. Every year.

Best Supporting Actor: Christoph Waltz ("Inglourious Basterds") That's an uber bingo! His speeches are weird, but at least he writes a speech.

Best animated feature: "Up" The people who work on animated films seem so much happier than regular people.

Best Song: "The Weary Kind" by Ryan Bingham and T-Bone Burnett from "Crazy Heart"

This show is really moving along. Everyone is going to win their Oscar pool, the way this is going...

RDJ, what with the sunglasses?

Best Original Screenplay: Mark Boal "The Hurt Locker"

I love Mark Boal's story. Embedded reporter with an idea. It's the dream.

John Hughes tribute time. Matthew Broderick, cute story. I imagine he really does hear about Ferris every day.

I think the John Hughes character that I resemble most closely is Duckie. Think about which one you would be.

The animated short feature was actually pretty interesting. Perish the thought, learning something during the Oscars.

Animated short: "Logorama" Nicholas Schmerkin (which actually looks pretty cool)

Documentary short: "Music by Prudence" Roger Ross Williams and Elinor Burkett

Live Action Short Film: "The New Tenants"

Ben Stiller's a Na'Vi! Ben Stiller's a Na'Vi! I really don't care what he does, I laughed the whole time anyway. DON'T TELL ME IT'S NOT FUNNY JOSH I DON'T CARE

These clips are reminding me of great moments from these films. Like "the parking lot" rabbi in "A Serious Man."

Best Makeup: "Star Trek" (I missed this earlier during Ben Stiller's silliness)

Adapted screenplay: Jeffrey Fletcher "Precious"

Best Supporting Actress: Mo'Nique "Precious" The second leas surprising award of the night.

Art Direction: "Avatar"

Costume design: "The Young Victoria." Quick poll: how much do you hate it when a winner points out "wow, I already have two of these." Esp. when you haven't heard of the person.

Come on, salute to horror films. We still have 2 sound awards, score, cinematography, documentary, editing, visual effects ...

Sound editing: "The Hurt Locker" Score one for Team Bigelow

Ha, look at this sound guy. He looks like someone from one of the horror movies.

Sound mixing: "The Hurt Locker"

So now we can forever say Academy Award nominated film "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen." @larsenonfilm did say it had good sound.

Cinematography: "Avatar"

People with dead careers talking about dead people. How fitting.

WHY IS THERE DANCING? Interpretive dancing "The Hurt Locker"? I believe the young people call this a FAIL.

Some things are controversial, but I have never heard anyone say "you know what I love? The dancing."

Original score: "Up"

Visual effects: "Avatar" Well, duh.

If you have not seen these films, these clips are awfully revealing.

Best Documentary Feature: "The Cove"

That's right Tyler Perry, they will NEVER say your name at the Oscars.

Film Editing: "The Hurt Locker"

Best Foreign Language Film: "El Secreto de Sus Ojos" ("The Secrets in Their Eyes")

This Best Actor intro is eating up a lot of time.

Best Actor: Jeff Bridges "Crazy Heart." If you ever wondered how many times you can say "man" during an Oscar acceptance speech and still sound cool, that was it.

Best Actress: Sandra Bullock ("the Blind Side") Sandra Bullock thanks her mom while her husband, the motorcycle man, cries. Ain't that America?

YEAH! Best Director: Kathryn Bigelow "The Hurt Locker." I wish her speech wasn't so dull.

Best Picture: "The Hurt Locker." I had a feeling about "the Hurt Locker" since I saw it in June. I've been pestering people to see it since then. it's just a great film. I don't want to say I told you so, but, well, I think I told you so. Good night, everybody.

80th Annual Academy Awards

Obeservations on the Oscar show:

The skinny women needs to pay attention to Alexandra Bryne, the costume design winner. That's what happens when you never eat and tan too much. You end up looking like that.
I don't really want to be reminded Barbra Streisand won an Oscar.
Ah, "Ratatouille." Pixar does it again. Sweet speech, Brad Bird.
"La Vie en Rose" wins for makeup. I was surprised "Sweeney Todd" wasn't nominated here.
If this "Happy Working Song" wins over the "Once" song, I am not going to be happy.
My kids are really ticked that "Transformers" did not win for visual effects. I am pleased that ads will not say tomorrow "OSCAR WINNER 'Transformers.'" And if it had won, Michael Bay would have never stopped talking about it. Although I liked The Rock's joke about the face-melting scene in "Raiders of the Lost Ark."
Hell yeah, "Sweeney Todd!" It's just art direction, but it's cool.
Does Johnny Depp's girlfriend have a missing front tooth?
Javier Bardem - awesome! His speech is in Spanish! Who else could do that?
The Oscar salutes to binoculars and periscopes and bad dreams were funny. This is going well.
Wow, the bee in "Bee Movie" is on. The bee is happy for you, "Peter and the Wolf" people in the back row, whose names the announcer just mispronounced.
First surprise of the night! Tilda Swinton! I will never believe she was born a woman. She is giving a wonderful speech.
Jessica Alba was the Techie geek cover girl this year. That whole thing is pretty creepy.
Adapted Screenplay for the Coens. I called it!
Michael Bay sighting! Boooooo!
Miley Cyrus is more comfortable on that stage than anyone I have seen tonight, including Jon Stewart.
Another boring "Enchanted" song that had better not beat out the "Once" song.
The sound editing award goes to "People being punched by Matt Damon for two hours." Still no "Transformers" Oscars! YES!
Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill are hysterically arguing over which of them is Halle Berry. Someone will write that this is undignified but these bits really save the show from being a complete bore.
And it's official. No "Transformers" Oscars. Thank God for Matt Damon, for more than one reason.
Second surprise of the night! Julie Christie gets beaten by the French chick, who is really beautiful.
Hee, Jon Stewart was playing Wii coming back from commercial. He said "am I supposed to be winded?" Well, probably not, but you aren't alone.
Woo! "Once"! Glen Hansard is wearing the exact same thing he wore to the Independent Spirit Awards. Marketa Irglova was wearing jeans last night, so she is not.
Boy, "The Bourne Ultimatum" is cleaning up.
Nicole Kidman IS pregnant, right?
Here is the third "Enchanted" song. Boy, this guy is boring. And is just me, or does the "Patrick Dempsey" dancer look a little like a Frankenstein? I guess these people didn't know there was more than one song in "Once."
Glen and Marketa won! Hooray! Glen was soo cool! They cut Marketa's mike! What the hell?! Then Jon Stewart says "Wow, that guy is so arrogant!" He brought Marketa back on, which is awesome.
I'm losing interest fast here. It was a nice touch to have the Iraq soldiers introduce the documentary short subject category, though.
If you ask me, Diablo Cody is way overdoing the cute girl trying to look bad thing. That tattoo is atrocious.
Man, we think today's stars dress weird. How about that Bette Davis? Was she wearing a giant Hershey's kiss as a hat?
Daniel Day Lewis bowed to Helen Mirren. And it was cute.
Way to go, Coens! "Henry Kissinger, Man on the Go" sounds awesome by the way.
And it's a wrap. "No Country for Old Men" continues the streak of ultra-violent Best Pictures, after last year's "The Departed."